Hey, to whoever who DOES read my blog, i need an opinion here. Should i switch to blogspot…?
I’ve already created a new acc cos i wanted to comment on Jack’s blog and you hv to be a user to comment. So i just create one lo. I’ve checked it out and tested it. Its pretty nice. Should i? Here, check it out and lemme know:
http://joannlimmer.blogspot.com/
Its really lame. =p Enjoy.
Hello!! Sorry, i haven’t updated my blog in ages! Don’t look at me like tat, i’ve beem suffering too. My confounded modem died so i havent been able to go online for a month. A MONTH! Do you know how agonizing that is?? Anyways, im using the normal line; not streamyx so everything is SLOOOOOW MO. But better than nothing.
Btw, i stopped workin d cos apparently i was only needed for 2 months and….my boss kinda told me tat on my last day (which i did not know was my last day at all.) It was pretty devastating… But anyway, i’ve cheered up a bit d. Using my now free time to daydream at home. XD Not very productive i admit, but definitely enjoyable.
Mm, the past few days have been like… I don’t know. Not what i expected it to be. Oh no, don’t get me wrong, i’m happy. Just sorta muddled, heady. Its so…..everything was like a Korean drama. Cannot believe it. Hehe, sorry, another one of those things too personal to reveal in a blog. Should talk about other things. xp
Last night i watched Jumper. The movie isnt out yet actually but my bro got preview tickets. Cool rite? We didnt have to pay at all! It was supa chunted lo. Before going into the theatre, we had to go pass this whole line of police (at least i think they’re police. Their uniform looks like it.) Sweaters are checked and they use this funny device (the type used in airports) where they run it over your body to check for metallic items. No handphones allowed. Bags are subject to checking. Fuuuuu…. So yeng lo! Hahaha….
The movie itself was pretty good. I’d say 7.5 on a scale of 10. Its abt this guy who discovers he has the ability to teleport. So he enjoys his life lo, going places…until he discovers there’s this group of people out to kill people with his ability (he’s not the only one). So basically thats that la. Not much of a story line but the effects are excellent. Really worth you money watching in the theatre (and to think, I DIDN’T HAFTA PAY!!) Nyek nyek nyek…. XD
ANYWAYS, i’m not too sure what to write about also. It always easier to update bit by bit. When u have a whole chunk of events tat have already happened, u just dunno where to start. I’ll try to update whenever i can la k?
Tata!
Oh gosh guys. You read the previous post where i was super emo and everything? Well, immediately after i finished that, i went to my room to laze around. While i was lying on my bed, i reached for my phone to reread the msgs in my inbox and so happens that one of the sms there was from Jerry who sent it that morning (but i hadnt really looked at it as i was rushing to work.) It was a simple msg that just said: Hafa a gr8 day at werk today! Go out and touch lives for the Lord!
At that moment, it really struck me. Touch lives for God.
It was stunning. Like God had just answered all my silly moanings and groanings and ramblings in that one sms.
I realize now that working isnt just something that we HAVE to do (sulkily and papaya-faced). Yes, we are bound by it because we need the money to survive. But it doesnt make life a meaningless monotony. Because going out each day is an oppurtunity to glorify God, to serve and touch others at our workplace.
I was actually really worried because i know how blessed i am to have landed this job (which for ANY school leaver, a huge deal) and it worried me to think that if this job was already tiring me out like this, what more if i start a REAL FULL TIME job? I wanted to know that life was so much more than just slaving away at the office so we can afford to live a decent life; not just for us but our families (i see now why kids are a problem ;p)
But once more, with last night’s miracle (can i call it a miracle? Yes i can), i am reminded once again that God is in control. Put God first, and all these things shall be added unto you. I know, its never easy to put Him first when ten thousand other things are constantly bugging us, worrying us, scaring us, stressing us out. But its true, when you please God and glorify Him, the bible says The joy of the Lord is my strength. Trust Him and and He will strengthen you.
I dont want to sound fake or anything. More often than not im struggling to experience God other than just in print and in church. Haha…sometimes i look at pastors and feel like: Heck, they’re lives are so smooth, so untroubled! But i think thats not true. Life will always be a road full of potholes and we’ll be driving over those holes; bumping and thumping along the way. Question is, are we gonna fight with God for the steering wheel? =) Why think so much when we’re not the driver?
Haha…this sounds like a sermon.But i hope my struggles bring some insight to you so that u’ll face ur struggles in a better way. =)
Kevin told me this the nite before my spm when i was freaking out. He just said: Our motto is in God we trust.
And i think thats all we can do. =)
Have a great day ahead guys!
Emo-nya!!! =.=
I used to think that working wasnt such a huge deal with being a grown up. But now im sort of feeling like…..work takes up SO MUCH of time and at the end of the day i’m just left with the feeling:
All THIS, and for WHAT?
It feels like we work so hard to make sure we can live comfortably; live up to society’s standards…
I’m pretty sure you’ve heard this before: Work harder for a bigger paycheck, to pay bigger bills, to buy a bigger house which u wont be able to enjoy cos ur so busy WORKING. I cant help feeling this way la. Im suddenly DREADING growing up even more than ever.
Money is such a ridiculous thing.
A ridiculous thing that we cant live without. *sigh*
Im not so much so emo to being depressed. Just a bit distressed la u know? Cos this whole cycle of paying, earning, loans, paychecks…. seems inevitable. And it kills people’s relationships. Work, stress, come back, take it out on those u love while reasoning ur working hard for them so why cant they be a bit more reasonable to YOU?? Even if ur not grumpy, there’s always house chores to suck out tat last bit of energy, restraint and optimism from u. Tada, u hv become nothing more than a robot. Senseless, aimless little ducks.
I suddenly see what a brilliant poet shakespeare was. He captured everything i feel in those few lines. Powerful, deep.
And now that i have finished strutting and fretting on this post (Oh, the irony!), I shall sign off, leaving evidence that i am the writer of these meaningless, insignificant ramblings.
A recollection of my thoughts at this moment, this point in my life.
Why am i talking like a long winded idiot? (x.x)
Oh hush, Joann!
(Anyways, i hope u get my point la; as silly as my rantings are… i wonder if other people feel the same way. =( …..)
Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, Creeps in this petty pace from day to day To the last syllable of recorded time, And all our yesterays have lighted fools The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon the stage And then is heard no more; it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.
-William Shakespeare (macbeth)-
Thank God its Friday!! Comments are depleting on my blog again….though, i dont blame you guys. Nothing much to comment about also eh?
Sad la you people! The One Way Love poem is so darn nice! How can u guys not like it?? Unappreciative….
Havent got much to say actually. Just want to blog for the sake of it. Oh joy. Dont comment on this post; its gonna be pathetic.
The stuff i wrote on fictionpress hasnt got that many fantastic reviews. About two to three reviews for each piece. Apparently "Facade" is a favourite. Weird. I didnt think it was that nice; but it was from the heart so maybe that was it?…
http://www.fictionpress.com/u/409848/
This is the link to all my stuff. Some are quite retarded. Especially the ones i wrote when i was younger. (Not to say the stuff i write NOW isnt retarded….its more retarded than ever… -.-")
Okay, im getting sick of rambling on this post.
Ta.
Bwahahaha!!! Saturday was awesome!!! To be honest, the day began pretty awfully. Woke up in the morning and suddenly received news that the Wans and Jerry not going. Gaaa! That meant the entire plan could be cancelled completely! My dreams were on the verge of being smashed on to the rocks wei!
Then while i was in that very very very agitated state, i decided to go calm down by playing with Joy. I stepped outof the house only to discover to my horror that she had chewed up another pair of shoes!
Wah lau, i tell u. In that moment, i totally defined the word RAGE. I picked up the mangled shoe and smacked Joy like dunno what. Well, not too savage la. But hard enough for her to hide in a corner with her head on the ground. She wouldnt come out or move even after 5 minutes. And in case u dont know Joy who is completely made up of RAW, PURE ENERGY; not moving and hiding there is really something. I was immensely pissed off le honestly. I glared at her at pointed at her cage, "IN. NOW." The command came close to being a growl. Joy didnt budge from her corner; head still down. "IN." I said again. She didnt move. I took one step towards her…… and whoooooosh…!
She was in her cage.
That is called the power of FURY. Usually Joy pretends she cant hear u if her ask her in. She knows perfectly well what IN means but she also knows perfectly well how to play idiot. U have to drag her into the cage. Literally. (she makes her body totally limp so its hard to pick her up and btw, she’s heavy. The only option is to drag her across the floor.) That fella ah…. =.="
Oh oh…! Anyway, in the end i managed to persuade the few remaining ppl who were supposed to go to just come along. Basically thats just Jason, my bro and i going to KLCC to meet Wei Yee and Mel. I was a lil worried that the ‘chemistry’ wouldnt work out but it went pretty well. We ate at Chilis!!!!! ^_^ That basically makes up for every single rotten thing tat happened. Loved it!! We didnt order the chips i so craved for though. Shame… Nvm! Next time next time!! (Chips with cheese and beef dip!! I want!!)
And i bumped into aaron at KLCC. Its totally weird cos i got the feeling that i WOULD bump into him. (So i gave a totally overrated exclaimation when i saw him. xp) Its not like i think of him all the time or something, it was just a sudden tot that occurred to me. Freaky cos this isnt the first time its happened. Its like SENSORS. I know tat sounds so stupid. Well, a bit awkward la meeting him. He always gives me the electric shock feeling. Seriously, my hands shiver, and my legs shake. Freakiness. I know what ur thinking and you’re wrong. Its not like tat.
Anyways, im at work now. Its 5pm i know. But seems there’s an emergency thingie for the math class cos the teacher couldnt make it so im filling in. Wonder if i can paid extra for this. *scratches chin ponderingly and greedily* XD
And Boon Yan has been asking n asking n asking me for a job here. I finally found her an opening here. Suddenly im worried. If she works here than what abt LD….? And if she doesnt perform well or do stuff properly then its like my credibility at stake. (Not tat im saying she wont do well… its just a thought u know?) I never thought about these ‘grown up stuff’ before. Gosh, i hope i did the right thing. I only had helping her in mind so i didnt consider these things. Whats done is done lo rite. But i do hope it works out for her.
K la. Im off! Will be working till 7.30. Class starts at 6 if im not mistaken. Gonna blur out and just hang around for now.
Ta!
Allow me to admire the way your hair sways,
the way your hands move,
your eyes laugh,
and how your voice lingers.
Allow me to revel at you in silence and distance,
that I watch and I wait for the day your eyes will meet mine,
And the stars shall collide for us.
Allow me to write for you in the dead of night,
in the stillness of our unknown existence,
and let me love you in depths and paths not traveled by young people like us,
because I feed on the different reactions that engage inside me when I think of you,
and the different personalities with different passions that are born when I see you.
I solely feed on the mystery that is you.
Allow me to think of you at night,
and create our own constellations that tell of our childhood tales,
our finding, our losing, and our hopeful reunion.
Till then I wait alone,
I anticipate the day you realize I have always been here,
and I shall embrace you with open arms,
rejoicing in the finding of a lost and long-forgotten love.
Till now I wait watching dreams and hopes pass by before my one way love,
but know that until that destined day when we so gloriously clash,
allow me to love you in silence,
in distance…
…and madness.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
WAIT!! Before you gasp in awesome wonder at the words above, let me clarify that I DID NOT WRITE THIS. Regrettably. *sigh* I hope i’ll be able to write such beautiful words one day.
I found this on fictionpress.com. The writer is Behardcore09. SIGH. I found this just now so just thought i might share it. Its lovely!!!
I wanna write like this!!! My work on fictionpress isnt getting much reviews though…Sadly. =(
Still, hope u enjoyed this as much as i did. Ta.
Yess!!! Friday!! That means NO WORK tomorrow!!! Hurrah!!
Gosh, u have no idea how crazy it is with my new class. This year I hv 5 students in my class and their english is really really awful. To be honest i dunno WHAT to teach them.
And there’s this fella in my class that MAKES ME WANT TO STRANGLE HIM!! His name is Jerry and he is soooooo infuriating!! He cant read properly and refuses to even try. He’ll just shoot off a couple of stupid syllables that doesnt make sense and expect me to pity him and tell him the answer. Plus, if he cant read, he cant do exercises. To top it up, he totally disregards me in class; if i tell him to keep quiet he continues talking eventhough im glaring to his face; if i tell him to do his work he’ll just play with his pencils and distract his friends, no matter how many times i remind him to do his work…
Stupid JERRY!!! Aaaaaarrrgghh!!
But work aside, i think things have been fun! Tomorrow i’ll be hanging out with the youth! Gonna play some board games and the dance mat thingie. Its pretty fun. We did that last sunday and i really enjoyed myself! Haha.. Jack dances like a pro. You wouldnt think he had it in him but when he’s on, he knows what he’s doing and he dont care what u think. Melody seriously reminds me of a squirrel when she on. More accurately- Hammy from ‘Over the Hedge’. Haha….she’s so hoppity hop. Its nice to watch Kein and Jaosn dance. Kevins moves are more straight; Jason is more swingy. I dunno how to explain… -.-" When u watch u’ll understand. Jerry looks like Hammy after drinking soft drinks. Xp
Initially i didnt wanna dance at all. I’m super kayu-fied and it’ll be embarrassing…. BUT, after everything, i figured i couldnt get cuter than Mrs. Wan. Bwahahaha…..!!! She’s so cute lo! XD Especially when there are two arrows at the same time n u hv to jump! Hehehe…… ;p
So i did lo, the dancing mat thing. And now im sorta hooked. Its fun! Aww heck, who cares if im kayu-fied… >.<"
Well, looking forward to tmr!! I hope i dont suddenly emo or anything.
Tomorrow, tomorrow, i love ya, tomorrow… You’re only a day away…. =)
"Oh Lord… This year has been so miserable. So rotten. So sad…" that was how my tearful prayer began on watch night service. (Pathetic init. Haha…but ah well, we all love playing the sob story sometimes.)
You received a lot of blessings too, didnt you, came God’s reply.
"Yeahh…but it was still hard… I had such a difficult time," I groaned, not letting up. (Self pity can be so nice to dwell in…) I was hoping for God to say something like: Poor you. Okay, more blessings for u in 2008!
FAT CHANCE.
God gave me an answer alright. It was not what i wanted to hear. Give more to Me.
"…….God, you cant be serious! Give more?? I gave up so much already this year! Cant you see i’m dying?? How to give more? I have nothing more!"
I gave everything for you, I died for you.
Oh great. I pouted, "Playing the ‘I sent Jesus to die on the cross’ card again. Thats not fair! I’m HUMAN! I’m not perfect……"
Oh, playing the ‘I’m human and imperfect card’ again, Joann?
I sulked. This was ridiculous. Arguing with God….did i actually hope to win??
Why do i set rules and ask you to sometimes take seemingly impossible steps?
I knew the answer to this one. I sighed slowly, "Because You know whats best for me and because You love me…. But it really isnt easy…! The grief, the fear that grips me is intensely real! It does hurt and i really want to know when it ends! Please God… When?"
Set your eyes on Me.
My heart shattered. It was another way of saying: Not yet, not now. It was not what i wanted to hear. I was hurt.
Do you remember what your motto was when you began 2007?
"My drive: To glorify You," I recalled what i had decided at the beginnig of 2007. And in a way, i realised i had kinda accomplished that. And in that moment, in spite of the struggles, i felt that i had won. A little bit anyway.
___________________________________________________________________________________________
Umm umm umm. Well, and on that note, i kick off into 2008. I know, its not much joy and merry making. In fact its rather melancholy but aww heck. I guess i just need to fix my eyes on Him and hope for the best…no, and KNOW that i’ll get the best.
I wish my faith would stop going up and down and up and down again… Stay up stay up darn it!! XD
This year hasnt started very nicely AT ALL. 2007 ENDED nicely though. I had a big fight with with one of my close friends. I’m still sulking that some people can be so overly dramatic and unrational. God is still berating me about my bull-headedness, insensitivity and quick temper in the whole affair. Ah well…. Guilty! I’ve been thinking a lot about my friendships. I think using the phrase: We’re best friends or You’re my best friend on me always brings about some kind of downfall in the relationship. Thats why i’ve refrained from using such words since form 3. Well, it happened again. WHAT LA……
Mel is still like my buddy till now. Probably cos she aint a friend. She my cousin. And that makes me so relieved. Blood is thicker than water. I hope things clear up though.
Anyway, wa. I’ve been rambling like an idiot. Thats all for now lo.
Bye!
Welcome 2008!! I know i havent been very faithful to my blog but everytime i wanna write something, i feel like, gosh, this is so boring! Why would anyone want to read this?? …and so i just delete everything and not post anything at all. Hehe…but anyway, i cant abandon my blog for too long. Boring or not, here goes.
Ehh….its kinda hard to tell out everything thats happened in the last month. I’ve enjoyed myself so so so tremendously! The main event for december to me was the Youth Christmas celebration. It was awesome to me largely because i had a whizzin’ great time performing the cantata. I am so so so proud of myself and all the people involved because we did such a great job over such a short period of time. We sang, we danced, we acted…..ooh! It was amazing!! I enjoyed myself so much i actually felt a little disappointed when the whole thing was over cos we’d never be able to do it again. Haha….
Not just that lo. Through this cantata, i got to know some of the youths i dont usually hang out with better. Its a really chunted thing discovering things you never knew about ur friends. I think the person i got to know most thru this thing was Kai Chi. Btw, he has a wonderful voice. You should hear him sing Oh Holy Night. It can honestly warm ur heart. And John is always funny in a lame sort of way. Hehehe.. I had SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much fun!!!!
And then on Christmas day I had an open house at my place. My relatives came, church friends came… It was nice lo. And the best part of it was I got to see my cousin Melanie again. We’re like a bunch of jakoons when we’re together. 
It was nice. Plus i got a lot of new clothes. When i say A LOT, i really mean A LOT. More than 6 new tops. YES, A LOT.
Then Jerry invited my bro, mel n i to yu yang’s place to play (guess what?) Hide n’ seek!!! Serious!! Hahaha….. I went with my bro only cos mel couldnt make it. Anyway, it was a crazy time at Yu Yang’s place. Can u imagine, 8 big sacks of potatoes playing hide n seek?? Haha… Yu Yang’s dog is a sweetheart btw. I’ve fallen in love with it.
Eh, so long d this post. K la. I have lots more but this are the main events that i love love love so much!!! ^^
Keep u guys updated if i have the time. I start work tmr d.
Ta!
